How to Ask for Money Gifts That Actually Grow
Because "just give me cash" is fine. But "invest in my future" is better.
Originally published on Substack
At some point, most of us have thought it:
“Why give me another birthday gift that I didn’t ask for, won’t use and will quietly donate in three months? I’d rather you just give me the money.”
But asking for cash feels awkward. Asking for investments? Most people don’t even know that’s an option.
It is. And it’s easier than you think.
First, Is It Rude to Ask for Money Instead of Gifts?
This question comes up a lot.
No, it isn’t rude… anymore.
Asking for money in place of physical gifts has become completely normal, especially for weddings, graduations, and milestone birthdays. People do it for honeymoon funds, house down payments, and experience funds all the time.
The key is how you ask. Saying, “give me cash,” feels transactional but saying, “help me build something that lasts” feels collaborative and definitely non-transactional.
Ask for Investments, Not Just Cash
The problem with asking for cash is when it arrives, it sits in a bank account earning almost nothing. And eventually, you spend it on something forgettable.
The smarter ask is an investment gift i.e., money that goes directly into your investment account and starts compounding immediately. And avoid asking for cash that you have to remember to invest later or a gift card. Ask for an actual investment, made on your behalf, the moment your loved one contributes.
That is what an investment gift registry makes possible.
How to Actually Ask, By Occasion
For your birthday: Add a link to your Endowe registry in your birthday Instagram story or group chat. A simple line like “If you want to give me something this year, I’m building my investment portfolio. Any gift you make goes straight into it.“ is all you need. Most people are relieved to have a clear, easy option.
For graduation: You’re about to be showered with cards and checks. Before the party, set up your registry and share the link with family and friends. Add a simple note: “I’ve set up an investment registry if anyone wants to contribute to my financial future instead of a physical gift.“
For your wedding: Add your Endowe registry alongside your traditional registry. Some guests will always want to buy a physical gift - let them. But for the ones who ask “what do you really need?”, your investment registry is the answer. Note it on your wedding website as your wealth building fund.
For baby showers and new parents: Your Endowe gift registry takes care of setting up a UGMA or UTMA custodial account for the baby. Instead of the fifteenth onesie, your loved ones contribute to your child’s first investment account. Every contribution compounds from day one.
What to Say (Word for Word)
Feeling stuck on the wording? Here are a few lines that work:
“We have everything we need. If you’d like to give a gift, we’d love contributions to our investment fund at [link].“
“This year I’m building my investment portfolio. Any contribution, big or small, goes straight in. Here’s my registry: [link].“
“Instead of gifts for the baby, we’re starting her investment account early. You can contribute here: [link].“
Keep it warm, be specific, and feel free to give people a ‘physical gifts’ option too, especially for occasions such as baby showers and weddings. Not everyone will want to contribute financially and that’s completely fine.
What this Change Means
As always, let’s do some quick math to bring this home:
What if your birthday registry collected $1,000 this year and you never added another dollar? That $1,000, invested at a 7% average annual return, becomes $1,967 in 10 years — from one birthday alone.
Now imagine that happens every year for just 5 years. Same $1,000 each year, no additional contributions after that. By year 10 your total would be $8,630, built entirely from birthday gifts that would have otherwise been forgotten.
Let the people who love you show up for your future!
Ready to set up your investment gift registry?
It takes a few minutes at endowe.com. And it’s completely free to create one. The next time someone asks what you want, you’ll have a real answer.
Because the best gifts don’t collect dust. They compound.
With lots of love,
Your godmother Ada
Disclaimer: As someone in finance as a regulated investment professional, I want to be clear: I’m not your financial adviser, and this post is education, not personalized advice. All investments carry risk including possible loss of principal, and past performance doesn’t guarantee future results. Talk to a professional who knows your full situation before making money moves.
